Hell week
This has been the week from hell. You've had them before. The type of week where EVERYTHING goes wrong. It was a nice intermixture of family and work-related stressors all of which were more extreme than normal. One was on Monday, another in the middle of the week, and yet another on Thursday and Friday. Hence the delay in blog entries. Each of the events that happened to me are now successfully resolved with the only lingering side effect being residual exhaustion since I did not have the chance to sleep, having had to bring my dog to a pre-planned vet appointment at 8:40. When you are in the midst of the week from hell, there are a few things you can do to help yourself navigate through it as best as possible.
The main thing to do is to moderate your reaction to the stressor. This gives you a way to take control over an event that may have initially been beyond your control. For example, it would be beyond your control that someone sent you and email with distressing content but you can control how to react to it. Monday's event was related to a stressful family member email I received at midnight. I reacted to the email and chose to take a route to end further discussion on the matter. This prevented my week from being even more hellish because it ended the conversation and eliminated the need for a constant back and forth flow of emails. Nevertheless, I went to bed later than I should have and paid the price the next day in terms of how I physically felt.
In the middle of the week, I had an overly complex case at work that took the entire day and was mentally draining. Since I was exhausted from earlier in the week, this just made things worse. And then, I had a work-related crisis towards the end of my day on Thursday which required me to kick into high gear and push my body past its limits (past 2am) to address it. Unlike Monday's event, this was a serious matter and one in which I had to invest the proper time into to make sure it was addressed properly.
Throughout the week, I purposely stayed calm and relaxed, well aware that if I became overly emotional that I will not be able to control these situations and deal with them as effectively as I needed to. Finally, it is all over and I am thankfully off one Monday. Tonight, I am going to turn into Rip van Winkle and get the sleep I need. Back to the regular blogging tomorrow. I would be interested in hearing on how some of my reader's deal with their hell weeks or some examples of your hell weeks.
posted by MedFriendly | 3:29 PM
9 Comments:
That's the thing with stressors in our lives, in order to keep a clear head, we first have to take a breath and kick into a mind frame to problem solve. It's later that everything hits you.
I hope you get the rest you need. I've just found your blog and like it. Best to you.
Thanks so much chrysalis! Glad to have you as a reader. And just as a reminder to people, you do not have to agree with me to have your messages posted, but postings with personal insults will be rejected.
I am sorry you had that kind of week. I think it is great that all 4 times you were able to step back and remain focused on what was important.
I'll have to think about hell week but I am too tired to think about it now. I think I am going to have a Rip VanWinkle sleep tonight except I don't think I will look as good in a beard when I wake up. How long did yours get? ;)
Thanks SeaSpray. Just trimmed the goatee tonight so no more Rip Van winkle beard. I'm officially back in action and feeling great!
Hi Dr Carone- I'm glad to hear that you are feeling refreshed again. This is long so please delete if you wish to.
When things are bad or it doesn't even have to be a hell week - just one thing really bothering me...I will call or visit a "trusted" friend. They are the ones in my innermost circle. I will tell my husband some things but not everything. Not trying to be deceptive there. I am actually a very open person when it comes to myself with the people I trust(and I don't give that trust easily) but I learned early on that there are some topics best discussed with friends. Plus with women you can rehash something until it feels right...he gets frustrated with that. I think because he either wants to fix it or disengage. Men are just wired differently. Also I have a couple of extremely trusted friends in the blogosphere (Chrysalis Angel is one of them) and I have also worked things out in my own mind with comments I have made on other blogs or in my own. Interestingly though...I don't put a lot of personal stuff in my blog. I think that is because I have told people about my blog and so I am extra careful. Also, I would never reveal (or if I do it is the exception)the most personal stuff anyway and never about someone else. I take confidentiality very seriously.
Also, when something is really serious...I am an advocate of counseling. My husband and I went to marital counseling years ago. (again, I guess that means-talking)
Sometimes just a good cry or primal scream into the pillow. ;) For me it involves release. Let it g-o-o-o.
But then what if it is one thing after the other and there is no time to vent. No choice. I have to step back, take a breath and operate in safety mode. Denial of sorts. Those are the times I want to crumble like a little girl and have God or someone sweep it all away. But I had to be the strong one so you do what you have to do.
So many variables.
I am grateful for my support system that comes from many sources in my life.
I find it interesting that I now count the blogosphere in that mix but in varying degrees.
So communication, prayer and self reliance depending on the situation. Prayer is the common thread through all of it though. I know I can't always understand everything nor am I going to like it and sometimes will even feel powerless. I derive peace in knowing that ultimately, things will work out for good even if I don't understand in the present. I love those moments when you can look back on the troubled/challenging times in life and sometimes see why things had to be as they were and especially like the Thank you God for not doing it my way moments when you realize if you got your way you would have gone on a negative path and were actually rescued from it.
Medfriendly...someone thought you were referring to me with the personal insults comment. I don't read it as such. If you visit my site, you'll know I'm not about any of that. I am a gentle, caring visitor. If anything was taken wrong that I wrote to you, please always contact me. I really like this site. Hope you had a joyous holiday.
Hi Chrysalis. No, I was not insulted by anything you wrote. I just wrote that insulting comment won't be posted because someone else had sent into something insulting that I did not publish. Enjoy the holidays!
I thought that's what you were referring to. I'm sorry you had to read something like that at all in the first place. You've got a nice site here. I like to come and read you.:)
I absolutely agree that maintaining calm alertness during extreme stress is vital, but what I've experienced is that while I'm doing that my body will go right on reacting to the stress. How much damage is done depends entirely on whether I'm healthy or in sickness at the time of the stress, whether or not I'm rested at the time, etc. When there are multiple stress times within a fairly short period of time as you described, or when the stressful situation becomes chronic, then all bets are off. I believe considerable damage is done throughout the body. And sometimes you just can't change things sufficiently or get away from the stress for a long time. I just try to pay attention to staying with my own personal health program -- what I eat, exercise, and aggressively if necessary creating short periods of absolute calm and maybe meditation. It's called "living", I guess, but I try to maintain some sense of control, not particularly of others but of my own behavior and thoughts. And yet -- it all takes its toll, eventually. Right?
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